This short fiction, written by a Filipino writer, is just G-R-E-A-T. Astig talaga magsulat ang Pinoy! If I’m not mistaken, Janet is the EIC of the magazine where I worked part-time as researcher/writer over 2 years ago.

Anyway, read on. This piece is just so beautifully written… 

It’s amazing how the brain works.

It’s remarkable how even one look, the subtlest glance, the slightest touch, a whiff, a hint of a familiar taste could launch memories of things and people you thought have been long forgotten. Pati yung mga gusto mo nang makalimutan pero hindi pa rin pala nabubura sa isip mo.

For instance, going down the flyover from Buendia to EDSA always reminds me of this former guy officemate who I got really close to, and who used to drive me home each night from work. Without fail, basta pagbaba ng flyover na yun tapos nakita ko yung buhol-buhol na traffic, lagi ko syang naaalala. Tapos in my mind, nakikita ko pa ang kanyang patawang look at naririnig ko pa syang pabirong nagtatanong na, “Traffic ba?” Ang weird, pero palagi yan. At natatawa pa rin ako each time.

Back in our old house in Mindanao Avenue in Quezon City, we used this sweet-smelling Glade plug-in that gave the house a distinct fragrance (add that to pots of potpourri that we had displayed then on top of the living room tables). Sa sala ako lagi natutulog nung college, kasi wala akong ginawa kundi mag-telebabad gabi-gabi. And there was a particular call that I always waited for. I used to distract myself with combing my dog’s hair or reading something while waiting for him to call. Or fighting the urge to dial his number instead. Ewan ko, pero hanggang ngayon, the smell of that Glade plug-in, or anything close to it, would always remind me of the countless nights I laid on the sofa, patiently waiting for a call until the wee hours of the night. That particular scent always launches an odd, inexplicable mixture of feelings (warmth, girlish giddiness, excitement, anxiety) that makes my stomach turn and my heart beat slightly faster than normal.   

Pag nakakakita ako ng aso sa malls o kung saan man, naaalala ko si Aura baby-doggie ko, my beloved Lhasa Apso. And if I close my eyes, I can easily smell her fur, remember how it feels like to kiss her small, moist nose, tickle her tummy, hear the little noise she makes when she’s happy. I can see her jumping up and down with excitement, yearning to be carried. I can see her waiting quietly by my bedside, not wanting to disturb my sleep, then rushing to me when she realizes that I am finally awake. Such a sweet, sweet creature, that baby girl.   

Marami akong ganyan. Billboards, kanta, pelikula, TV shows, favorite expressions, suot, gamit, mannerisms na nakakapagpa-alala sa akin ng iba’t-ibang tao o karanasan. Things that may mean nothing meaning to others but could launch so much emotions that I didn’t really think I could still feel up to now. Sabi nga, “Two people could look at exactly the same thing and see something totally different.”

Kahit maraming taon na ang nakakalipas, sa isang stimulus lang, bumabalik ulit lahat. Tipong pasok sa linyang “I can still remember how you looked/ sounded/ smelled/ felt like (wala pa akong malalagay sa ‘tasted.’ Hehehe).”    

Paano kaya naiko-konekta ng utak ang isang tunog, lasa, amoy, itsura sa mga ‘di maipaliwanag na damdamin at napakadaming alaala?

"(A computer’s memory) is better than real memory because real memory, at the cost of much effort, learns to remember but not to forget." - Umberto Eco’s Foucault’s Pendulum

…ang aking mga nilistang kapalpakan at kahihiyan nung ako’y chikiting, highschool, at college student.

Pa-jolog-an portion! Eto na ang mga nakapangingilabot na trip ko nung late 80s to early 90s!!!

I. ENTERTAINMENT

1. Nauso ang rap stars. Peborit ko nun si Francis Magalona, especially his “Mga Kababayan Ko” ay “Cold Summer Nights.” (DJ, can I hear some scratch!)

Si Andrew E. naman, bagaman hindi ko favorite, eh sumikat din ng sobra! With his timeless classics Humanap Ka Ng Panget, Binibirocha, at syempre, ang Andrew Ford Medina, among others.

Sing with me now… (Aminin! Sigurado akong maka-kanta mo ‘to!)

ANDREW FORD MEDINA

Guess what, you know last night
Yo, it was the best
I met a pretty girlie na taga-IS
Mayro’n siyang mga kasama, four to make it sure
Isa lang ang aking napuna, lahat sila demure

Kaya’t ang sabi niya, "Hey Andrew,
I would like you to meet my friends"
And believe me, lahay sila ay may Mercedez Benz
This is Ana, this is Karen, this is Tanya, this is Jill
Lahat sila nakatira sa San Lorenzo Ville

Among the four, kay Ana, ako napatingin
At pagkatapos no’n si Ana ay biglang lumapit sa ‘kin
Tinanong niya ‘ko "Hey Andrew, can I have your number too?"
Sumagot ako, "801-67-22" (I swear nung bata ako ay tinatawagan ko pang number na ‘to!)

2. Sumunod kay Andrew E. ay ang bago pa lang sumikat noon na si Michael V. Hindi ko na alam kung ano ang title, basta pangontra lang sa “Humanap Ka Ng Panget” ni Andrew E. Ang kay Michael V. naman goes, “Kung gusto mo ng panget, wag mo na kaming isabit!” Dumating din si Lady D with Sa-sa-sadami (this is in the wake of the Gulf War, Iraq vs. Kuwait) “Sa-sa-saddami ng problema natin, sa-sa-saddami ng utang pa rin, sa-sa-saddami ng kaguluhan, sumasakit ang ulo ng mamamayan!”

3. Saigono Iwake na kinanta ng di mabilang na artists. Actually, una itong sumikat as “Ikaw Pa Rin Ang Iibigin Ko” ni Ted Ito, tapos sumunod ang English version ni Keempee de Leon na “Saigone Iwake, My One and Only. ”

4. Sa di ko maintindihang ka-dahilanan, naging big hits din ang songs ng mga kid singers. Isa na dyan ang “Eh Kasi Bata” (na nakalimutan ko na kung sino ang kumanta) at ang makasaysayang, “Ang Batang Lumaki sa Sinturon” ni LA Lopez.

5. Sobrang usong dance steps ang Running Man, Roger Rabbit, at Scissors…

6. Pango pa si Regine Velasquez. Hindi pa rin sya maputi. Ang sikat nya pang kanta ay Narito Ako at Promdi.

7. Hanggang ngayon, isa sa pinaka-romantic OPM hits para sa akin ang “Basta’t Kasama Kita” ni Dingdong Avanzado. Bumili pa ako ng tape nito nung grade 5 ako. I think nandon din sa album na iyon ang, “Tatlong Bentesingko.”

8. Meron akong tape ng “Sharon Sings Valera” na pinapakinggan ko tuwing umaga. Kahalinhinan ng album ng APO Hiking Society na noon pa man ay paborito ko na.

9. Ang kauna-unahang CD ko ay album ni James Ingram

10. Ang tatay ko ay mahilig sa Karaoke. Kaya sobrang dami naming collection noon ng mga Minus-One at Multiplex—yung mga tipong 4 na tapes sa isang package, tapos may kasamang lyric book na mali-mali naman. Hehehe.

11. Isa akong big fan ng Air Supply (yeah, I’m a sucker for cheesy love songs!)

12. Ang radio stations na lagi kong pinakikinggan ay 97.1 Campus Radio at 93.9 na palaging may joke time.

13. Ang 101.9 WRR ay Romance Radio pa. English ang language, at mejo high-end pa ang target market. 

14. Feeling ko lahat ng ka-henerasyon ko ay nakaranas sumayaw sa school o sa parties ng either of the following:

1. Supersonic ng The Jets (S if for Super and the U is for Unique! The P is for perfection…)
2. Name Game ni Madonna (Tony, Tony, To-Tony, Fanana-fana-fo-Fony, Fi-fie-mo-Mony…Tony!)
3. Electric Youth ni Debbie Gibson

15. Mga bastos na kanta tulad ng “Sally (that Girl!)” at “Doo-wah-diddy (diddy-dam-diddy-doo!) na later on ay naging song sa AngTV pag 4:30 na!

16. Merong nakakadiring radio contest ang Tuseran Forte noon kung saan iu-ubo mo sa telepono ang tono ng isang kanta! (Kamusta naman, anti-cough nga kasi itong Tuseran).

17. Sikat pa si Tito Pepe ng Kwarta o Kahon (na ang taping ay laging sa sosyal na sosyal na SM North)

II. POLITICS/ SOCIAL ISSUES

1. Gulf War ni George Bush…and history now repeats itself with the son…

2. Ang nakakatawang agawan for Presidency nina Fidel Ramos at Miriam Santiago.

3. ANG BROWNOUT! Pero dito ko talaga napa-tunayan ang resilience at unbelievable capacity to stay happy ng mga Pilipino. Ilang taon din na araw-araw ang napaka-habang brownout, pero di lumaon eh nakasanayan na rin ito, at naging source of fun pa nga for some! Tulad sa village namin, may iisang bahay na may generator. Tuwing brownout na sa gabi, people of different ages flock to that house at don nagchi-chikahan at naglalaro ang magka-kapitbahay hanggang bumalik ang kuryente! Come to think of it, those times were fun, too! For more bonding! Nagre-review ako ng lessons at gumagawa ng assignment na naka-kandila o gamit ang maliliit na bumbilya na kinakabit namin sa car baterries using alligator clips. Pagka-pasko o new year, parang regalo ng gobyerno na walang brownout! Everyday, tatawag ako sa Meralco (631-1111 pa ang hotline number nila) at magtatanong kung ilang oras ang brownout. Sasagot sila ng tipong, “8 hours po!” tapos magte-thank you lang ako at ibababa ang telepono ng walang reklamo. Pero ngayon, sandali lang mawalan ng kuryente ay hindi ako mapakali!

III. ICT (Info and Communication Technology)

1. 6 digits pa ang landline phone number (ang number namin na 90-35-68 ay ginawang 939-35-68)

2. Ang phone pa namin noon ay yung kulay itim na ubod ng bigat tapos de-ikot pa ang dial (kaya totoo noon ang “napudpod na ang daliri ko sa pag-dial!” pag laging busy ang line ng tinatawagan)

3. Ang cellphones noon ay parang ga-cabinet sa laki, tapos ang antenna ay kasing-laki ng ballpen! Ang in pa ay ang pagers (EasyCall at Pocketbell!) tapos dapat alam mo ang corresponding trunklines para makapag-padala ng messages.

4. Ang computer ko ay parang kasing laki ng personal refrigerator. Pa-higa pa ang porma ng CPU. Tapos kelangan mo pa ng DOS para mag-boot ang iba’t-ibang programs (pwera na lang kung self-booting sya), and dapat alam mo pa kung ano-anong commands na kelangan i-type sa C prompt (C://) to make it run. Ang dami kong 5.25” floppy diskettes na talaga naman ubod ng prone to viruses at ang daling masira! 

Wala pang Windows (nung nagpalit ako ng computer nung highschool na ako, ang aking “brand new” PC was running Windows 3.1). Pero nung elementary days, I was using Wordstar and Lotus. Tipong para makapag-boldface, italicize o underline ka ng isang word, kelangan alam mo ang appropriate beginning tag at end tag. Para ka na ring computer programmer, eh nagta-type ka lang naman! Hahaha. 

IV. Literature

2. Napaka-laking impluwensya sa akin ng Sweet Valley Twins at Sweet Valley High! Feeling ko kung magkakaroon ng ala-Game Ka Na Ba na ang trivia questions ay tungkol sa characters ng Sweet Valley, magcha-champion ako!

The Wakefields: Ned, Alice, Steven, Elizabeth, Jessica. Middle school/ HS Friends: Amy Sutton, Enid Rollins, Lila Fowler, Janet Howell, Ellen Riteman, Mary Wallace, Jeffrey French, Todd Wilkins, Cara Walker, Dana Larson, Aaron Dallas, Bruce Patman, Tom McKay, Winston Egbert, Caroline Pearce, Olivia Davidson, Mr. Collins, Mr. Bowman… Sigh.

3. Nung mejo nag-dalaga na ako, naging Sweet Dreams naman isa sa akin favorite reading stuff. And the all-time favorite is, of course, Wrong Way Romance ni Sherry Cobb South (na ang characters ay nagngangalang Darby Hanes and Bruce Eduards). HAY! Kung teenage kilig literature ang pag-uusapan, itong librong ito ang ire-recommend ko sa kahit kanino! Nakakabwiset kasi may humiram ng kopya ko nito at hindi na ibinalik sa akin.

4. Sobrang mura ng mga pocketbooks noon. Ang Sweet Valley at Sweet Dreams ay 54.00 lang sa National Bookstore (at P 40.50 nga lang sa Goodwill!). Ang shelves ko noon sa kwarto ay punong-puno ng pocketbooks. Halos ma-kumpleto ko ang Sweet Valley collection, pero bad trip dahil inanay ang shelf ng hindi ko napapansin kaya ang dami kong librong napilitan akong itapon. Huhuhu. 

V. FASHION

1. Shoulder pads (mukhang football players ang mga babae non!), bulldog shoes

VI. FOOD

1. May naglalako/ nagde-deliver pa ng Magnolia Chocolait (na nasa malalaking glass bottles pa! Yummy!) at Yakult!

When you’ve seen a lifetime of darkness, you’ll know when it’s finally light.

When you’ve made a thousand wrong choices, you’ll know when it’s finally right.

In His eyes I found hope for tomorrow and I felt my heart overflow.

For right then and there, I knew He was love.

And that’s all I needed to know.

One decision less than three months ago changed me in a way I myself could never fully understand, much less explain to others.

There is freedom in complete surrender and obedience. There is so much joy, peace, and comfort in the knowledge that I am loved. And that I can love. And that I have a God who is a God of love.

I went to Davao to help bring joy to children and adolescents who were victims of years of abuse from people they trusted. But after a few hours of games, and playing, and singing, and storytelling, I went home feeling like I was the one who actually had more to learn about loving and forgiving.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, or boastful, or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, it is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

   1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Kaya kong gamitin ang MS Word kahit walang mouse. At yan ay posible lamang sa pamamagitan ng pag-memorya ng shortcut keys.

Kadalasan ng keyboard shortcuts ay comprised of the Ctrl button at ang unang letra ng command. Halimbawa, Ctrl + J ang shortcut command para sa Justified alignment. Ctrl + L at Ctrl + R naman para sa Left  and Right alignment, respectively. 

Ctrl + Enter at mapupunta ka sa susunod na pahina. Ito ay para hindi mo na kelangang pindutin ng 100 times ang Enter key para lang magsimula ng pagta-type sa bagong page.

May mga ibang shortcuts naman na hindi ang first letter ng command ang gamit. Tulad ng Ctrl + E – For Center alignment. Dahil ang Ctrl + C ay para sa Copy command. Nandyan din ang Ctrl + X para sa Cut command. Ctrl + V naman ang gamit para sa Paste (dahil ang Ctrl + P ay shortcut na para sa Print!).

At kung gusto mong palakihin ang font ng hindi gamit ang cursor, i-select ang text (Shift at ang appropriate arrow key) at pindutin ang Shift at Ctrl keys ng sabay. Hold them down and press the > (greater than) button to increase size, or the < (less than) button to decrease font size.

Isang trick din pala sa mas mabilis na Cut and Paste method: ang Drag and Drop. Napaka-helpful na trick na ito lalo na sa mga tulad ko na matagal bago mag-finalize ng structure sa sinusulat. Madalas, what I initially intended to use as intro ay nagiging ending, ang ending ay nagiging intro, at mga pang-gitnang paragraphs ay nalilipat din sa kung saan-saan. Para gawin and drag-and-drop trick, i-select ang text na gustong ilipat ng pwesto. Click on the whole text block, hold down the left mouse button, and drag to the position in the document where you want to transfer it.

Kung mangyaring wala kang maalala sa mga shortcut keys na ito at ayaw mo pa ring mag-mouse, pindutin lang ang Alt key kasabay ng letter na naka-underline sa bawat option sa Menu Bar (kunyari, Alt + F para sa File or Alt + A para sa Table).

Malaking tulong din ang Function keys o F keys sa ibabaw ng keyboard mo (di ko nga lang sure kung may F keys din sa Mac):

§         F1 ang shortcut to access the Help menu in any MS Office program.

§         Press F5 to refresh the screen

§         F12 to automatically go to the Save As dialog box

§         F7 to check your Spelling and Grammar. Highlight a word and press Shift + F7 naman para buksan ang Thesaurus (boy, this is my favorite MS Word tool!).

§          Alt + F4 naman ang gamit para isara ang kahit anong MS Office program.    

Alam niyo bang ang unang-una kong trabaho ay Technical Writer (i.e. tagasulat ng content for user manuals, Help, at online tutorials ng mga software)? Kaya mejo enjoy din ako sa pagsusulat ng mga instructional eklavoo na tulad nito. Ang geeky, no? J

Kung ikaw ay galit kay Bill Gates, allergic ka sa Windows, at advocate ka ng FOSS (Free and Open Source Software), magagamit mo pa rin ang keyboard shortcuts na ito. Nung nasa NGO pa ako, ang gamit namin ay Open Office (counterpart ng MS Office ni Gates, pero ito ay license-free at pwede mo pa pakealaman ang programming). Halos parehas lang ang functions at commands kaya wala namang problema. 

May alam ka pa bang ibang shortcut commands na wala dito? Share naman!

There are only 8 of us in my Econ barkada. We don’t see each other very often (actually, madalas na nga ang twice or thrice a month), especially now that Ren is out of the country and Dada is part of an ASEAN fellowship program. We keep each other updated through our egroup. The thread of emails today was unusually nostalgic and sentimental (unusual kasi ako lang naman ang kadalasang puro ka-dramahan sa barkada namin). I was particularly amused by something Tina wrote in her post. She was recounting the many changes that each of us has undergone since we first met in Palma Hall back in ‘96. And here’s what she wrote about me:

si che -che - "si che-che christian???" akalain mo nga naman! si che-che na nauna pa matuto magyosi, i still remember nag billiards tayo one time nung college at habang tumitira si che-che ay hawak nya ang tako sa isang kamay, sa kabila naman ay yosi! ang lakas pa mag inom! pero ngayon baligtad na mundo. two months ago nagcoffee kami dalawa ni che, sabi ba naman sakin eh itigil ko na daw magyosi! natawa tuloy ako! hahahaha naninibago ako! ibang iba na si che talaga! pero mukha syang masaya ngayon and natutuwa ako for you, you found what you are longing for.= )

Haaaay! ano pa kaya magbabago sa atin? can’t wait to witness! I love you all!

I just got back from a wonderful 3-day sabbatical in Caliraya. Actually, it was a retreat organized by the Singles’ Ministry in CCF-Alabang. The speakers were all amazing, the food was great, and most importantly, the games and the bonding were just pure WOW! Maraming, marami akong ikekwento about Caliraya, but I need to head to a meeting so saka na lang.

This Thursday, I am going to Davao for small mission work. When I told my friend Herbert I’ll be there for Church service, sabi nya, "Ang layo naman ng pinagsisimbahan mo!" Hehehe. Honestly, I am super, super excited. Especially since it wouldn’t be all work. Part of the itinerary is a trip to Samal Island. Weeee! Not to mention the fact that Davao is my favorite city in the Philippines. It was love at first sight, really. Since the first time I went there in 2004, I’ve always declared that if I were to relocate in the province, I will definitely choose to be in Davao. Pero laging maiiksi lang yung visit ko sa Davao. The first time, I think I stayed for only three days. The second time, about two days lang for a conference. At least ngayon, 4 days naman. May Samal Island pa!

God is good. Very much so.

Kwento-kwento pagbalik ko!

One thing I’ve always felt uncomfortable about is lying. I hate it and I rarely lie unless I really, really have to, I was sworn to secrecy, or if it is for a bigger purpose.

I usually get into trouble not for lying but for being too truthful even when unnecessary. And in situations when I am forced to lie and the little act or statement of dishonesty led me into a rut I shouldn’t have been in to begin with, my belief that there really is freedom in simply saying the truth is further reinforced.

I remember this one time when I was about 8 or 9 and I lost my bracelet. It was a pretty expensive one and I was too scared to tell anyone I couldn’t find it. My mom came up to me and asked, "San ang bracelet mo?" I hastily answered, "Nasa kwarto po." Then a look of disappointment crossed her face. She held up her hand, my bracelet in it. Sheesh, it was a terrible feeling. Sana pala sinabi ko na lang. Kung mapalo man ako, eh di tapos na. ‘Di pa ko magi-guilty. Sabi nga ng college prof kong si Chito Avecilla, "The truth may not always be pleasing, but it will always set you free."

It both surprises and appalls me how some could weave untrue stories left and right and not feel the least bit guilty about it. 

Here’s a thought for everyone: DO NOT LIE. Once you start lying, the rest of your life will be spent doing damage control, and you will live in constant fear of being found out.

HALA KA!