My Turf

This morning, someone from Mowel Fund called me up to ask if I was still interested in joining the Directing Workshop. A few weeks ago, when I found out that MFI reopened, I immediately contacted them and reserved a slot. After all, our President has long given his assurance that the company would shoulder the tuition fee in case I decide to study. Just last week, however, an opportunity to do the thing I’ve always dreamed of cropped up. Saying  I got very excited would be putting it mildy. Hence, despite the knowledge that the workshop orientation was scheduled that Saturday, I deliberately ignored it and was resolved on not going anymore. I couldnt’ expect the company to let me go that easily after paying for my training, could I? So just last week, it was almost, "Goodbye, MFI."

But the heavens seem to be telling me something else. I was suppposed to be interviewed last week but it got canceled. I didn’t hear from them at all yesterday. This did not make me feel discouraged or unworthy, though because while I admit there are tasks I am totally insecure about, there are also some that I am very confident I could manage, if not do well entirely. And the particular job I was targeting is actually one of them. However, the no-call made me ask myself if now is the time to move. There is no question about my desire to land a job like that one day, but I’ve always held that timing plays a huge role in making things happen. So when I did not get a new interview schedule and Mowel Fund called, I guess the choice is quite obvious…

The whole morning, I rushed to type my request letter. I felt quite scared that it wouldn’t get approved because I’d need the tuition fee to be ready by Friday (if you work in a corporate setup, you know how it usually takes long for budget requests to be processed). Secondly, I wasn’t sure if they’d allow me to be out of the office twice a week to attend classes, given the many responsibilities that I couldn’t easily pass on to someone else.

However, come 5:30 this afternoon, I was just beaming, as I gleefully gave the approved and signed request forms to the Accounting Department. So I guess I’ll officially be an MF student starting Friday this week.  Yay!

And now is the time for me to step into my Quotations Queen shoes. Here’s a favorite from Henry David Thoreau:

"If you advance confidently in the direction of your dreams and endeavor to live the life which you have imagined, you will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.  You will soon pass an invisible boundary…new, universal, more liberal laws will begin to establish themselves around and within you, and you will live with the license of a higher order of beings."

Someone called it Self-Fulfilling Prophecy. I subscribe to this belief too, that if there is something you always talk about or think of being or having all the time…I don’t know how, but with steadfast effort and infallible faith, it just happens! This I believe with all my heart, because looking back, I realize that there is not one thing I truly desired in my life that I did not eventually get. Of course, a fulfilling love life remains, well, just that: a heartfelt wish. Nonetheless, I remain extremely confident that this too will someday arrive.

It just takes a while for some people, I’ve always said. In my case, retribution has always seemed to take its sweet time. I guess I’m simply one of those folks who have learned to be patient not by choice, but through forceful life circumstances (like, "Life, the ruthless, relentless teacher, expects us to learn by half-killing us" kind of thing). But if there’s one good thing about delayed gratification, it’s this: when your time comes, it will be nothing short of fantastic.

Maybe not now, but someday… "No" could also turn out to be a simple "Not yet" or an eventual "Yes."